What Is Your Petition?

   In 1Samuel, chapter 1, we read of a woman named Hannah. She was married to a man named Elkanah. He loved her(v. 5) and was 'better to her than ten sons'(v. 8). However, there was something that Hannah desired that her husband could not give her. She longed for a child! Now, he was able to produce children, for he was father to sons and daughters with his other wife, Peninnah. The problem was- Hannah was barren. Peninnah, like the enemy we encounter every day in our own lives, provoked Hannah and made her fret because she couldn't have a child. She taunted her like the devil taunts God's children, when we are faced with impossible situations. BUT GOD...who was witness to the unbearable bullying of Peninnah against Hannah, decided that enough was enough! So, when Hannah went into the temple to pray- as she always did- her SUDDENLY moment came! Her broken, bleeding heart of trust in the God she served, was finally broken into so many pieces, that even her husband's love, provision, and gifts of granduer,  could not repair it anymore! Her heart was truly shattered!
   BUT GOD... in His loving mercy, recognized the cry of a soul that had reached the end of her rope that had a knot in it, but could no longer keep her from falling... As she wept bitterly while praying in the temple, she vowed a vow unto the God of her salvation. In verse 11, she said, "O Lord of hosts, if Thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of Thine handmaid- and REMEMBER me- and NOT FORGET Thine handmaid, but will give unto Thine handmaid, a man child, then I will give him unto the Lord all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head!" If you'll notice, she kept referring to herself as God's handmaid. She was reminding Him that she was His servant. She did not come in a demanding way or with a deserving attitude, but humbly reminded God that she was His servant. Maybe she was saying that even though she was only a servant, that she was still important and that even the servants are worth remembering! Yes, we are God's servants, but we are His children. He will NEVER forget or forsake His children! He WILL remember us! I guess Hannah felt like we do sometimes, when we wonder if God remembers where we are. He knows exactly what we are going through and exactly when and how to deliver us! Hannah was at her wit's end with Peninnah's cruel words and with watching her and Elkanah have child after child through the years--but no child for her. She was God's handmaid. His servant. Yet Peninnah was rewarded with the children! What an injustice- or so it seemed. Yes, Peninnah had many children with Elkanah, but there was still an emptiness in her that God would have loved to fill, if only she would have asked. Peninnah had longings too! That's why she lashed out at Hannah. She wanted Hannah's strength and Elkanah's deep love for her as well!
   BUT GOD... in all His faithfulness, decided it was time to reveal His glory! Eli thought Hannah was drunk because she only moved her lips when she prayed. God didn't need to hear her outspoken words. He heard her broken, trusting heart as it shattered for the last time. He knew this was more than she could bear. It was time for a miracle and time for her to be honored for her stedfast faithfulness. Hannah knew that if God didn't answer her petition, that there would be no answer to suffice.
   Eli told Hannah to 'go in peace', and that God would grant her petition that she asked of Him. So Hannah went her way, ate, and was sad no more! WHAT IS YOUR PETITION? Have you been humble in asking God for what you need? Have you been faithful in service to the Kingdom? These questions are for me too! I'm not perfect, but my heart  perfectly longs to serve my Heavenly Father and be who He needs me to be. Do I battle doubt? YES! Will I yield to it? NO! Not as long as God will grant me grace and strength- and He will. Let your heart speak to God. Allow yourself to fall helplessly into His arms in total abandon! Trust that He has heard your petition and will give you a SUDDENLY answer like He did for Hannah. REMEMBER...the taunting of the enemy is a sure sign that your answer is on the way!

Love Is The Answer...

I believe there's a deep, desperate longing in every human being, to be loved. When we feel this desperation inside for love, we almost fall to our knees because of the weight it brings to our tired souls. We long for a touch, a listening ear, or an understanding heart that connects with ours, yet it seems beyond our reach at times. I must confess- I ache for love in so many ways! Don't get me wrong- I am loved by many people. My family and friends are a blessing in my life. But, the greatest ache I have, is to know that God loves me desperately and needs me like I need Him. Am I passionate about God like I should be? No. Do I want to be? A resounding- YES!!! I often wonder if there is something wrong with me when I see others who proclaim to have this perfect peace and unspeakable joy, because of God's love for them. Sometimes I don't feel this awesome feeling. So, you know what I'm doing? I'm CHOOSING to believe in His love for me. I'm choosing to believe in my love for Him, and that long-time relationships such as ours, have moments where the spark is not so sparky! In Jeremiah 29:13, God says we shall seek Him and find Him when we search for Him with all our hearts. I have begun to understand this verse that has gotten my attention in the past, and now- now that I have been going through the trial of trials- I am beginning to know my heavenly Father in a way I haven't known Him before. I'm beginning to see His handiwork in all the saving grace that has spared me from going off the deep end, when the pain refuses to let me go. Of course, the enemy doesn't want me to REALLY realize just what the love of God truly is in my life, and how it will radically change me when I do, so, he tries to remind me of how unworthy I am to be loved by the Creator of this vast universe who can actually dwell in this tiny heart of mine! I know you are probably saying, "Well, God is Love", and that He gave His only Son to die for me because of His love, but, in times of chaos, pain, sickness, and temptation- to grasp this truth...I struggle. I look for that billboard right off the highway that says, "I love you! Yes, YOU!" signed, God! I look for His love around every corner, in every song, atop every mountain, and even in the eyes of a stranger, who might have a word of hope for me. The bottom line is...I need to search the Word for myself, and seek Him for myself, and have an intimate experience for myself, that nothing can take away, or no man can dispute. I can do like David did in Psalm 19:14. I can praise God for all the beauty I see around me in the heavens and in the world, and then ask Him to cleanse me of secret faults, and then request that the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in His sight. That covers all the bases. Well, not to mention the fact that we must live according to His holy commandments, so that when we are in need, we can boldly approach the throne with confidence, and ask what we will and we shall receive. We must trust in His love, and in His decisions for our life. Just because we don't get what we want, doesn't mean He doesn't love us. He cared enough to give us His very best! Trust! That is the key to finding a Love that is the answer to all that you will ever need!